Theatre Guild

NEARLY EVER AFTER

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Rory is a perfectly normal person, with a perfectly normal life. Except that sometimes, her wishes come true… and animals talk to her… and her Mum says that a Fairy left her in the garden when she was a baby. Other than that, totally normal. But when Rory wakes up one night to find Prince Charming in her kitchen, things get very not-normal, very quickly. Meanwhile in the Land Faraway, a Princess is sleeping in a tower, and the evil Witch who cursed her is trying to make herself Queen by finding a King. With trolls, betrayal, pirates, and unnecessary musical numbers standing in their way, can Rory and Charming save the Princess and all of Faraway before the wedding? An alternative telling of Sleeping Beauty (sort of), Nearly Ever After is a story about a secret magical world and how it takes a team to rescue a Princess. With all the tropes and characters of a traditional pantomime, reimagined by someone who watched way too many films as a child, Nearly Ever After is a fun, extremely silly, action packed panto for all the family. "

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Characters

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Rory (Aurora) - Princess. A reasonably normal person in a sea of madness. She is confident, capable and definitely in love with her cat. She stands for none of Charming’s nonsense, but is kind and genuinely wants to save the day.

 

Woman

Age: 25-35

Singing

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Prince Charming - Moron. Charming is not Charming at all. He is smug, cheesy, overly confident and utterly oblivious all at once. He believes in himself, which is good because nobody else does or should.

 

Man

Age: 25-35

Singing

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Peter Pan - Peter Pan is definitely an Eleven year old boy and 100% not an adult woman. He swears. Except that he is clearly an adult woman. He is brave and honest and has a heart of gold. He is desperately in love with Charming and the only thing standing in the way of their love is the fact that Charming thinks Peter is an eleven year old boy.

 

Woman

Age: 25-35

Singing

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Melevola - Evil and fabulous. There is nothing Melevola likes more than crushing the spirit of her enemies, except perhaps crushing the spirit of her devoted followers. She is larger than life and absolutely livid, 90% of the time. She is desperately auditioning suitors to be her King.

 

Dame

Any Age

Singing

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Cpt Hook - A suitor. Suave, debonair and a little bit flamboyant. He charms Melevola to begin with but she quickly becomes tired of him being such an absolute simp.

 

Any gender

Any Age

Singing

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Daisy - Daisy is a cow and she is also kind of a cow. She has magic powers and like most of the women in Faraway, does not like Charming at all. She hides a good heart quite well.

 

Woman

Any Age

Singing

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Steve - Cats look very different on each side of the gate. In the real world they look like little, fluffy, cuties… but on the Faraway side they look super hot. Steve is brave and quick

thinking, he always seems to be in the right place at the right time. However, like most cats, he does have a tendency to favour the person giving out the best treats.

 

Any gender but is supposed to be a male cat.

Age: 25-35

Singing

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Smee - Smee is NOT the Captain of the Pirates, and he is very emotional about it. He is very superstitious and quite needy.

 

Any gender

Any Age

Singing

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Fairy GodMother - A traditional Fairy GodMother. Sparkly, delicate and absolutely raging. She is exhausted by everyone else’s incompetence and lets them know loudly. She is always one tiny step away from destroying the world and everyone in it, but luckily she’s on the good side so she resists that urge.

 

Woman

Any Age

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Buttons - Buttons is getting too old for this. He has been living in the forest of thorns since his first Prince got stuck in there while trying to break the spell. He’s like if Ben Gunn was played by a young Bruce Willis.

 

Man

Age: 35+

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Troll - This troll is specifically Charming’s troll. It follows him around and says horrible stuff about him online. It is a weird, horrible little thing

 

Any gender

Any Age

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Nigel - Nigel likes flies. A lot.

 

Spider

Age: However old Spiders are

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Several Smaller Supporting roles available including:

 

Tinkerbell

Rumplestiltskin

Queen of the mermaids

Ugly Sisters

Pied Piper

The King + Queen

Various pirates, mermaids, villagers, villains and trolls